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It's the church's way, not my way
By Michael Coren
October 30, 2009
Michael Coren
In what must be one of the most intelligent and genuinely Christian statements from the Church of England in several years, Fr. Ed Tomlinson of Kent, England, has caused something of a scandal by writing an acutely orthodox and perceptive piece about death.
“In the last few years it has become painfully obvious that many families I have conducted funerals for have absolutely no desire for any Christian content whatsoever,” he writes. “I have then stood like a lemon, wondering why on Earth I am present at the funeral of somebody led in by the tunes of Tina Turner, summed up in pithy platitudes of sentimental and secular poets and sent into the furnace with ‘I did it my way’ blaring out across the speakers! To be brutally honest I can think of a hundred better ways of spending my time as a priest on God’s Earth. What is the point of my being present if spiritually unwanted?”
“In the last few years it has become painfully obvious that many families I have conducted funerals for have absolutely no desire for any Christian content whatsoever,” he writes. “I have then stood like a lemon, wondering why on Earth I am present at the funeral of somebody led in by the tunes of Tina Turner, summed up in pithy platitudes of sentimental and secular poets and sent into the furnace with ‘I did it my way’ blaring out across the speakers! To be brutally honest I can think of a hundred better ways of spending my time as a priest on God’s Earth. What is the point of my being present if spiritually unwanted?”
Brilliant. But far too honest to be accepted by the professionally thin-skinned. Some of the vicar’s opponents sent his blog entry to the press and the good man has been condemned as a heartless extremist. Yet all he was saying was that Christianity is Christianity and that if you want Santa, the Easter Bunny or Oprah you need to go elsewhere. He was not being cruel or uncaring about the dead and their families but merely asking them to be consistent about what they believe and not try to impose a secular, saccharine sweet muddle on a great rite of Christian passage.
Many people who call themselves Christians are in fact church-abusers. They ignore their church unless they can get something out of it. A baptism here, a funeral there and a wedding because the church is so much prettier than city hall. It’s particularly difficult at a time of death to explain to a grieving family that Bob may have been a nice guy but he wasn’t a Christian, didn’t want a Christian funeral and isn’t actually entitled to one. Good old Fr. Ed said it like it is and is being battered by those who want to “do it their way.”
As Catholics we see a similar approach all the time. The church is supposed to be like some great, supernatural vending machine that always delivers candy and pop. When it doesn’t we complain, demand our money back and perhaps give the thing a kick. “I want, give me.” People leave Catholicism not because the church lets them down but precisely because it remains Catholic.
If your marriage fails and you cannot obtain an annulment, if you want to live in sin and the church says no, if you want to co-habit with your same-sex partners but are told by a priest that this is contrary to the faith, if you want to decide church teaching rather than the Pope then it is you and not the church founded by Christ that is in the wrong.
This type of language is jarring to some people, especially those who prefer their theology and place of worship warm and cuddly rather than as a timeless guide to salvation and an absolute route back to God and eternity.
But just like only indulgent and irresponsible parents never tell a child off or fail to impose various boundaries, the church as God’s vehicle of instruction on Earth has a duty to save our souls and not soothe our self-esteem.
Someone in this very newspaper wrote recently that he resented having to kneel at Communion and take the consecrated host on his tongue. It’s not up to you, ungrateful wretch! It’s the body and blood of Jesus Christ and you ought to show ultimate respect by falling to your knees and not placing your hands between the Eucharist and the priest who has the, literally, God-given right and power to perform this most important of functions.
It’s not about us or about them but about Him. He who gave us a church to carry out His will. Pray for poor Fr. Ed, and that he’ll realize that he’s very close to the complete truth — as Tina Turner never, ever sung, it’s only a conversion away.
Many people who call themselves Christians are in fact church-abusers. They ignore their church unless they can get something out of it. A baptism here, a funeral there and a wedding because the church is so much prettier than city hall. It’s particularly difficult at a time of death to explain to a grieving family that Bob may have been a nice guy but he wasn’t a Christian, didn’t want a Christian funeral and isn’t actually entitled to one. Good old Fr. Ed said it like it is and is being battered by those who want to “do it their way.”
As Catholics we see a similar approach all the time. The church is supposed to be like some great, supernatural vending machine that always delivers candy and pop. When it doesn’t we complain, demand our money back and perhaps give the thing a kick. “I want, give me.” People leave Catholicism not because the church lets them down but precisely because it remains Catholic.
If your marriage fails and you cannot obtain an annulment, if you want to live in sin and the church says no, if you want to co-habit with your same-sex partners but are told by a priest that this is contrary to the faith, if you want to decide church teaching rather than the Pope then it is you and not the church founded by Christ that is in the wrong.
This type of language is jarring to some people, especially those who prefer their theology and place of worship warm and cuddly rather than as a timeless guide to salvation and an absolute route back to God and eternity.
But just like only indulgent and irresponsible parents never tell a child off or fail to impose various boundaries, the church as God’s vehicle of instruction on Earth has a duty to save our souls and not soothe our self-esteem.
Someone in this very newspaper wrote recently that he resented having to kneel at Communion and take the consecrated host on his tongue. It’s not up to you, ungrateful wretch! It’s the body and blood of Jesus Christ and you ought to show ultimate respect by falling to your knees and not placing your hands between the Eucharist and the priest who has the, literally, God-given right and power to perform this most important of functions.
It’s not about us or about them but about Him. He who gave us a church to carry out His will. Pray for poor Fr. Ed, and that he’ll realize that he’s very close to the complete truth — as Tina Turner never, ever sung, it’s only a conversion away.
Michael Coren